Tuesday, January 20, 2009

catching you up to speed

I won't start from the beginning, it's just too long ago.
So let's start from where I am now: I'm 35yrs old. I have, by all measures, outlived my life expectancy. I am living on borrowed time.
I have many down times - mainly in winter and during the summer humidity that creeps into the Ottawa Valley. The air either freezes or dampens my lungs so that my already bad circulation turns to numbness.
I also have many up moments: mainly freaking out health care professionals when I present myself with, well, very strange vital signs. Vital signs that either indicate that I shouldn't be conscious or make the nurses question their equipment.
I've also had to deal with the whole question of limits (what can I do, what can't I do), death (how I want to die: pull the plug or no), and of course the mystery of what is keeping me alive if virtually no un-operated on TA patients (with a few expectations) reach their mid-30s.
I think it's my stubbornness, will-to-live, and that good 'ol joie-de-vivre (thanks mom). Perhaps being a vegetarian for 19.5 yrs has also helped, perhaps it's the Reiki, or just dumb luck. I still think much of it has to do with my stubbornness.