Sunday, June 9, 2013

the call

I have come to learn that Murphy's law is more about the law of the Universe. On Tuesday I wrote about bed-waits and only 3 days later I received a call offering a bed in TO. I was instructed to admit myself to my heart-hospital on Saturday to be transported to the centre of the universe on Sunday for a week of tests. I was also told that my "support person" needed to come along. Two unfortunates occurred with this call: the first was the timing of the call: late Friday afternoon, too late for my support person, if I had one, to ask boss for the week off (or at least the first few days of next week). The second unfortunate is that I still didn't have a support person - for the first half of the journey. The coordinator on the other end of the pre-transplant unit stated I need one and said I cannot do this alone. I understood this clearly so when my heart-hospital called to admit me yesterday I had to pass on the bed because of these unfortunates. This situation is giving me more stress than I had anticipated. I thought conscious choice was more manageable because my eyes are wide open. Not so much.
More things have transpired since then - so much roller coaster for one person to handle - and then of course family. I have stopped updating details on "social media" primarily because most people, mainly acquaintance, are pretty ignorant to all that's involved in this MESS. I don't think people stop to think about how hard all of these options are. It must be nice to live in the illusion that "if it was me I'd do..." No one can ever imagine what they'd do until they're in that situation because what you think you'd do changes when reality hits. Reality influences decision-making more than imagining. Period.
~ more to come ~